Things NOT to Say to a Pregnant Woman

I got it with my pregnancies with Avah and Ayden. So of course, I’m getting it now with AJ. Difference is I was younger and bit nicer with those pregnancies. I’m not as young and damn sure not as nice. I understand people run out of shit to say. I mean sure the courteous thing to do would be to ask “how are you feeling?” or “How are things going with the pregnancy?” Ya know decent things to say. But no, apparently the usual pregnancy comments that MANY women face are negative and commentary on how big they are. Like as if us pregant women don’t feel crappy enough. Oh you mean this bowling ball I carry around 24/7 and try to sleep with at night? (Ya know, I didn’t even realize it existed until your comment!???)

Almost daily, I and i’m sure MANY OTHERS hear the following:

  1. “You’re huge/big/large/massive etc…”
  2. “Is it twins in there?”
  3. “We’re you this big with your other babies?”
  4. “Should you be eating that?”
  5. “You’re about to pop!”
  6. “So and so isn’t as big as you…”
  7. “You must be due soon”

THUMPER

Let me just reiterate some things so I don’t have to keep repeating myself in defense of my bump size and before you decide to slap a ‘WIDE LOAD’ sticker on my back:

  • I’m growing a human. Plain and simple.
  • I’m short w/ a short torso (there’s nowhere for me to grow but outward!)
  • On top of a baby, I also have a large fibroid growing in my uterus. So that doesn’t help much.
  • This is my 3rd baby (you get bigger with each subsequent pregnancy- GOOGLE it!).
  • I’m healthy, my baby is healthy and my doctor is extremely happy with my progress thus far in regards to weight gain.
  • oh and lastly…. BITE ME! 😉

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ADRIAN

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Time Goes So Fast

Last post on my blog, in January, I posted a picture with a quote about trying. Well because that was that day my husband and I talked and decided we will actively try to get pregnant. After talking we decided that we did in fact want to have one more child together. Collectively, we have a good number however, together we only have Ayden. After the miscarriage last year and healing emotionally from that we knew in our hearts that we did in fact want to try again. So January 19th we decided 2018 will be the year. If it happens great, if it doesn’t then it wasn’t meant to be and we’d be okay with that too.

Well I conceived around Valentine’s day and it’s all been quite a blur since. Everything is going well with my pregnancy and as of today I am now 21 weeks pregnant with a baby boy. Ayden is SUPER excited to be big brother. He is constantly talking to the baby, desperately wants him to kick his hand. He’s already so attentive to me and the baby he’s going to be a great big brother.

This pregnancy at times seems to be flying by. Even though it’s rough on my body some days I try to remember to enjoy it because this is the absolute last time I’ll experience this. So I just try to remind myself of that. However, it’s been 8 years since I was pregnant with Ayden so most days my body is cursing me out for doing this again.

Hopefully, I can stay up to date with my blog but there’s no promises. Time is just going so fast it’s so hard to keep up!

❤ Adrian

mothers day

Mother’s Day 2018

 

December 17th

I knew the date December 17th would come and I knew it would bring up emotions and would sting a bit. I didn’t however, expect the date’s impending arrival to hit me as hard as it has. These past couple of days have been so excruciating (surprisingly though today, Saturday, has been good). I’ve been withdrawn from practically everyone. I cry at night; alone. I hold it together just enough to get inside my office and just fall apart all over again. Thursday I left my office and as soon as I got in my car, I cried. Yesterday I cried some more.

It just hit me the other day. It was like opening a flood gate of emotions and I can’t shut it off. I don’t know if all this emotion and sadness is attributed to the due date and loss only. Or perhaps all the other crap in my life is why I’m taking this so hard. The holidays certainly don’t help but I gotta put on a brave face and have a happy Christmas for my kids. 

Just the thought that this week we’d be having our baby just cuts me to the core. I so badly wanted to do something on the due date to remember and honor the loss but we have no money. Maybe that attributes to my sadness too; Not being able to do something in memory. I thought about making an ornament or something in a little picture frame and then it dawned on me that I don’t even have a sonogram picture. It’s like the whole pregnancy is a figment of my imagination; but the pain is certainly real. 

I do believe that everything happens for a reason. The good and the bad. But sometimes that belief still don’t ease the pain. I’m hoping my winter break from work will allow me to rest and get refocused and heal again. I really had a tough 2017 and I so badly want to leave all the hurt behind. 

❤ Adrian

My Reset Time

So I tried. Honestly, I did. I erased all the apps and up until today, I had remained off all of my social media sites. A whole 4 days! It was nice and refreshing not to be plagued by all the Hollywood gossip, horrible news around the world or the incomprehensible actions of the day by #45 and his circus. However, the reality is, social media is a huge part of me and looking back I needed more than a time away from social media; I needed a reset. 

Life gets insane at times. Mine is definitely no exception. Last week, I had that moment where all the crap in your life that you just pile on and keep on going until you just basically say “f*%# this I’m over it”. Basically, that was me last week. 

Many know what is going on in my personal life with my family. Add that to my usual life of two kids (one whose teacher and school workload will drive me insane by the end of the year and my oldest, who is like a living version of Dr. Jekl and Mr. Hyde and I never know what day she will have), a husband, a household and not to mention assisting an office and 21 people. It’s a lot and I rarely stop. So you can imagine the weight that I pile on to where I just said “enough”.

Luckily, I was able to remove myself from socials for a few days. I’m on vacation this whole week of Thanksgiving and it’s been a great time to catch up on sleep and get a grip on my life. It’s been nice and honestly what I needed. 

I simply needed a reset! We all need reset time. It’s not easy this thing called life; however, the good parts surely outweigh the bad.

❤ Adrian

Avah & Middle School

Today, after dropping Avah off at school, while driving, I just thought about how happy she’s been since attending Liberty. Also, how happy I’ve been since she’s started at Liberty. When we had to leave Pizzo due to boundary changes I always thought to myself we’d never find a more cohesive, family type atmosphere than what we had at Pizzo. The women at Pizzo I still hold dear to my heart for guiding me through the darkest, most confusing time in my life. They were my guardian angels. At Lewis, Avah adored Ms. Eder and I, as a parent, had a great respect for her and all she did for her students.  We remain in touch with her after all these years. When she moved midway through 4th grade, Avah had a rough time with the remainder of elementary school and to sum it up, we were ready for a change. Big time!

Fast forward a few years and I now find myself sitting back and watching my daughter flourish and have the most incredible group of teachers and paras who surround her. They push her just enough to make sure she’s learning, growing and achieving greatness. Today, a few of the teachers and I were talking and laughing about her new love for the song, ‘Sweet Caroline’. Then I had a great conversation with the ESE coordinator at the school. It is an amazing feeling as a parent to have a great relationship your child’s school and feel like your part of something special which I truly feel I am at Liberty.

Most people dread the middle school years. I was one of them. However, these so far has been some of the best for Avah. She continuously grows and improves in areas that she needed work in. They implemented working the coffee cart where she is a barista and serves coffee to teachers. I’m sure she has her moments and has rough patches through the day but its the team knowing her and quirks and being able to work through those troublesome times that helps her overcome the rough days.

I can’t say enough great things about the ASD team at Liberty. Honestly, about everyone I’ve come in contact at the school. The principal is awesome, all the teachers I’ve come in contact with are great and of course, the lovely lunch ladies that greet us every morning as we walk through the gate who are quick to smile, say ‘hello’ and offer Avah her chicken biscuit.

I honestly can’t say enough great things about this school and am so thankful for CHOICE to allow her to be able to attend this school. It has truly made a difference in Avah’s life.

Go Eagles!

  • Adrian